BEREAVEMENT COLUMN

A husband’s love

By TRACY RENEE LEE

During my first year of business in the funeral profession, I met a man known throughout the area as a cantankerous sort of man. I somehow found favor with him, and we became good friends. He was my first client who asked me to do an estate burial.
In Texas, families can bury their deceased loved ones on their property. The ground must be set aside as a burial ground, and access must be granted to anyone who desires to visit the existing graves in perpetuity.
My friend has recently suffered the signs of aging and was recently placed in hospice. Due to his health, he found it necessary to sell his ranch. Therefore, he contacted me and said he wanted to disinter his wife and daughter and reinter them at a municipal cemetery. I filed for the necessary permits, and as soon as we received them back from the state, we arranged to follow his wishes.
We are currently suffering a heat advisory throughout Texas, and it is hotter here than I ever imagined it could be. My husband and I worked a few years in Las Vegas, and I am surprised how the hot Texas summer dwarfs the Nevada heat. It must be the East Texas humidity that makes it so excruciatingly hot.
As we arrived at my friend’s ranch this weekend, we drove to the location where his wife and daughter have laid in rest for over a decade. My friend was sitting in his truck, watching to ensure that the utmost respect was taken and that every precaution was observed to protect the integrity of their encasements. At one point, my friend exited the truck to view the caskets of his loved ones as they were raised out of the earth, and overcome with grief, he fell to his knees. Tears were streaming down our faces as we disinterred his beloved and daughter and transported them to their new place of rest.
As we reinterred his loved ones, my friend looked on with a broken heart. He walked with me, and we marked his grave, the one to the right of his beloved. My heart was broken as my friend reminded me of his wishes. He blew a kiss toward his beloved, now resting in her new grave, and I heard him whisper these words to her. “I’ll be there soon, my love. Give me about two weeks, and this will all be over.” Then he turned his attention back to me, and with a tender look, he said, “I trust you; you know I do. You’ve always done just as I’ve asked, but this is my most important request because I won’t be here to see it done. Don’t allow anyone to change my wishes. Please make this happen for me.” I promised that I would do as he bade. He expressed his love and appreciation for me, and I for him, and then he returned to the old truck. He sat there for a moment, his head bowed, and I knew he was uttering prayers to his Lord and words of endearment to his beloved. He drove away. Tears streamed down my cheeks.
My friend is very ill, but as his last act of getting things right, he insisted on honoring his beloved wife and deceased daughter. That is what men of honor do. They take their last ounce of energy and put things right before they leave this earth. I don’t care what my friend may have done in the past. His final concern, the very last thing he can do, is protecting his family’s dignity and integrity.
When he dies, as I know he will very soon, I will call for his body. With dignity, honor, and respect, I shall prepare him to rest beside his wife in her new place just as he asked me to. When I do, I will say a prayer for them to progress throughout eternity together as a family.
I look forward to that day. The day I will see them together, beaming in happiness, rather than the solitude I have seen him suffer since I have known him. My heart will be joyful for them on that beautiful and glorious day. I know his will be too.w.

My name is Tracy Renee Lee. I am a Certified Grief Counselor (GC-C), Funeral Director (FDIC), published author, syndicated columnist, Podcaster, and founder of the “Mikey Joe Children’s Memorial” and Heaven Sent, Corp. I write books, weekly bereavement articles, Podcasts, and Grief BRIEFs related to understanding and coping with grief. I am the American Funeral Director of the Year Runner-Up and recipient of the BBB’s Integrity Award.

For additional encouragement, please visit my podcast “Deadline” on Spotify and follow me on Instagram at “Deadline_TracyLee.”