Speaking your mind – at what cost?

Several years ago, Brianna, a Facebook friend, reminded us that when we become wiser with our words, life becomes better. Sometimes, the wisest words are the ones we choose not to say.
Are you known for speaking your mind? If done well, the ability to express your opinion with courage – and respect – can bring about positive change in your community, your culture and even your home.
But what happens when our words create disharmony instead of harmony?
Every day, I’m aware that two conflicting natures war within me. One pulls me away from God, toward selfishness, impatience and pride. The other draws me toward Him – to love, humility and obedience.
Colossians 4:6 (ESV) says, “Let your speech always be gracious, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how you ought to answer each person.”
Christians are called to be salt. But if we’re not careful, our anger can drown out our message.
How many times have our words created tension in our relationships? How often have we been so focused on making our point that we failed to notice the hurt we left behind – the chill in the room or the way our words landed like a sledgehammer?
Sometimes the fallout is so painful that others don’t want to be around us. Sometimes we don’t even want to be around ourselves. In the process, we may damage our witness in ways that can’t be restored.
And the damage doesn’t stop there. Gossip, careless criticism and spreading rumors can effectively damage others’ reputations. How we manage our communications can open or close doors in our ministry and job opportunities.
Isn’t it true that the often-delayed consequences of our actions can postpone our repentance? What if each time we gave in to our sinful nature, we experienced an immediate consequence (like an instant breakup or shame at being exposed)? I suspect we’d repent much sooner and save ourselves and others a lot of pain.
On the other hand, imagine if we truly submitted our words to the Holy Spirit. Consider what it would be like to express ourselves out of a deep awareness of who we are in Christ instead of being driven by raw emotion.
How can we live out Colossians 4:6? Maybe the best way is to pray before we speak.
Our identity as a follower of Christ should show up in every conversation we have. This doesn’t mean we’ll never sin, but our attitude toward sinful speech should change. We’d no longer excuse it or accept it as being okay.
Instead, we’ll aim to speak words that are gracious and seasoned with salt, aligning with God’s heart and purposes.

Sheryl H. Boldt is a sales executive for Wave 94 and author of the blog, TodayCanBeDifferent.net. Connect with her at SherylHBoldt.Wave94@gmail.com.